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Published on:

30th Sep 2025

The Importance of Patience with Change

Bilvavi Bitachon Chabura with Aveeshi Lev - Shiur 13

Transcript
Speaker A:

Okay, we're gonna go ahead and get started tonight.

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We are jumping into page 58 of the Vavavi Mishkan EVNA section 4.

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Let me just make sure.

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Okay.

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And we spoke a lot about the importance and the.

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The opportunity for a Yid to go above and beyond his own level of belief and what he's able to accomplish.

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And we talked a lot about the idea of becoming a gadol and how gedolim of our time, the reason they're gedolim is because of Hashem deciding they were going to be gedolim.

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Yeah, obviously they've put in a fair amount of work into that godless.

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But at the end of the day, the reality of godliness being the primary change agent for what happens and what doesn't happen remains true, even by Gedal.

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And that was an interesting point that he had stressed.

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And we talked about the fact that if we don't change our orientation in life with what's truly important, then eventually we will end up in a situation where we will look back on days gone by and wonder where the time went.

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And that we've got this unique opportunity, as Yiddin, to live truly spiritual lives that differ from the lives of the ammonam.

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And we have this unique ability that Hashem gave us the spark of godliness, the chilek elokom imal mamish that is waiting to come out of its shell, is waiting for its klepos to be shaken off of it so that we can uplift everything that we encounter within Ulamhaza.

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But in order to do that, there has to be a shift and there has to be a shift in our thinking.

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And you can't change our thinking, as we spoke about, without working on what's going on between your two years.

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We can invest in the gym, we can invest in therapy, we can invest in learning.

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We can invest in all of the important things that help us grow and change.

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But if we don't know how to silence the noise in our mind with the thinking that usually does not have our best interest in mind, we are left with a much slower, trudgier battle.

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Because it's like kind of climbing through mud versus walking on a paved path.

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And so if there's an opportunity for us to walk on a paved path up a hill versus trudging in mud, we would choose walking on a path.

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For many, the path is how goes it?

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It's just, life is fine.

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They can roll with the punches.

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They can.

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They either have easier lives than others.

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They either have ways of dealing with it that aren't as dramatic as others.

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They're either, you know, master manifesters, and they create their reality in ways that others may not.

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e to my kids as a Ballabus in:

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You have to be able to kind of clear the Runway.

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And so we've talked about that.

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We talked about the fact that as balabhatim, there has to be effort in monitoring how we think.

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There has to be the employment of tools, whether it is therapy or it is meditation or it is hispodus, or it is just the ability to quiet the noise in the head in a variety of other ways without distraction and to really live life on life's terms.

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When you live life on life's terms, it doesn't mean suffer life on life's terms.

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It means live life on life's terms to the best of your ability and to the best that's offered.

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And for many, that's very difficult.

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And those are the ones that I'm talking to, the ones similar to me who can go through their ups and downs and ultimately know that if their course corrected thinking doesn't take precedence in their avodha, then davening is what it is.

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It's learning connection with people, it's fathering, it's connection with your wife, it's connection with your community that continues to dwindle.

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So there has to be time for that in someone's life.

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What we're going to talk about today is something Avisha Lev has really had to work on because it's an un.

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It's an un.

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It's an unlearned trait, naturally, for me, which is the trait of patience.

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I am someone who will spend unnecessary amounts of money to avoid lines.

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I am someone who will quickly become agitated in my internal self, even though I may not show it expressively when people are not getting to the point.

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I am someone who has really almost had to sit on their hands physically in certain meetings because I. I fidget because I want things to move along.

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And in our Vodas hashem, the idea of patience is kind of laughable in the sense where we're just trying to fit it into the incredibly busy schedule that we already have.

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We're not in a situation where we can be patient or go with the flow in our day to day lives.

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Many of us, if we could, I bet you we still wouldn't.

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Because ultimately the noise in our head is so much louder than our ability to be cool, calm and collected and to roll with life all the more so we're about to go into Yom Kippur.

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We have an opportunity of newness at this point of the year, more than any other point of the year.

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The opportunity to recreate how we are going to show up in the world.

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It cannot happen without patience.

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That means that we give ourselves space to fall, we give ourselves space to make mistakes, we give ourselves space to slow down and we give ourselves space to exit the rat race.

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And for many, that is a reality that they won't think about.

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And they'll think about Chuva and they'll think about Tefila and they'll think about Tzedakah and they'll think about all the things they want to do better.

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And they'll think about the Charat that they had on the Averos.

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They did.

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But the ability to recreate our reality as new people after Yom Kippur, during Yom Kippur, heading into the Yomtif of Sukkos is a real possibility if you're willing to be patient.

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A few weeks ago we talked about the fact that every one of us is willing to strategize on anything we can to help our businesses succeed.

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you want your life to look in:

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How many of you guys have sat down and wrote down the things that were actually accomplished this year and what you want to see happen by the end of next year and how you plan on doing it?

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The difference between a company and us is that we have team members in our lives.

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It's pretty much on us to make that decision and to execute the vision.

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Why is it that when it comes to business, there's this innate understanding and just what happens is we can't get to the desired state that we want without putting some sort of thoughts to paper.

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We can't expect business results to change if we don't plan.

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But with our lives, we hope that by going and having a good davening, by going and learning, by going and doing the things we're supposed to do that may not fit within a truly strategic plan of our life, that we'll just remember to do these things and you know, as things come up in life, we're gonna, you know, we're gonna roll with it.

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I know for many guys that I speak to, myself included, that if the plan isn't written out and it's not retract and retweaked every other day or every week or every month, even then you get lost in whatever the year brings.

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We are not equipped with the level of consciousness that we're currently at to deal with life's on life's terms without a plan, and that plan will not be executed perfectly.

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But without the plan, without taking the time to strategize how things will be different and where you want to get to.

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And I think the important thing of a plan is not just the goal and where you want to get to, but the tactics that are fully within your control as to how you're going to see those come to a reality.

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And I'm not talking about super monumental, big things.

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I told all my kids, I said, guys, if I were you and I could do one thing different from back in the day, I would have picked really one small thing that for the entire year I did could have just been Sitzis making a bracha on tzitzis.

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It could be Nagel Wasser.

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I went through it.

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I said, just one year, because you're now 10, 14, 16.

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When you're my age, you'll have compounded 15, 20 years of 30 years, in Rafi's case of compounded, completed small things that others won't have taken the time to do.

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And like most kids, I'm sure they won't do it, but the idea is still correct.

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And so if we're in a situation as we go through the upcoming year and we feel that we are going to just be better without putting those thoughts to paper, without journaling, if I may, and it doesn't freak someone out, and writing down how things go over the year again, not every day, but every month.

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This was my plan.

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Where am I holding?

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This was what I was going to do to protect my mental health.

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This is what I was going to do to get fit.

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This is what I was going to do to learn more or one of those things doesn't matter.

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Do not take on too much, but we have to have a plan as we enter Yom Kippur.

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We cannot go into Yom Kippur, crossing our fingers and saying, I hope it's different.

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So today he's going to talk about patience in our vodos hashem, which is really what a plan needs.

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It needs to know that it's a yearly plan.

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It's going to take a whole year to change whatever behaviors you're committing to changing.

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And I'll tell you what mine is.

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I've got a few things that I'm going to be committing to doing and it's really just two.

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Number one is I'm going to meditate into hispoeitis four days a week.

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Four days a week, that's what I'm gonna do.

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And for me, that means 20 to 30 minute sessions, 40 minutes, four days a week.

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I know that when I do that well, my weeks are completely different.

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I know that at the end of this past week, I went into Shabbos really, really beat up from the week.

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Went into the new year with a call, Arav Yantif from a large client in Texas.

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Why this gentleman called me Erev Yantev, I don't know, but that's what happened.

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And said, hey man, October 1st, we're done.

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Chag Sameach to you.

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Wish you all the best.

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Have a happy New Year, okay?

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And then the next day, right after Yontev, we got told that we had another client that was unplugging in Georgia.

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Eight buildings.

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It was rough.

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So I went into Shabbos pretty beat up and I wasn't okay.

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May have looked okay at Shoal.

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No one's gonna know what's happening.

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o I came into the sun room at:

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In here it's black.

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And I just sat with it and I leaned into it and I meditated on it and I just let whatever came to me come and I felt what I felt and I allowed those feelings to come in.

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I was angry.

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I was angry and I was feeling bad for myself that when I have something good going, somehow it's always got to have a ceiling.

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And then it's got to come crashing down either.

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Not terribly crashing down, but financial success for a vishalev has a ceiling.

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There, there is, there's.

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Thank God, you know, life is good.

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I do okay, but it's never going to be that good.

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That was my thought.

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Feeling bad for myself and self sabotaging.

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And then I started thinking to myself, well, it's funny that I give this chabura that educates people on how to behave and I'm honest with people that I'm not holding at everything that I share.

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I'm just trying to share the tools and resources in which I use.

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So besides feeling slightly hypocritical, not being able to employ some of the things, though I did Come in here and do some of the work that we talk about.

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But I was very much not okay.

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There was this.

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There was this piece of me that started to realize, wait a second.

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You're tying your entire value, which is really what I do.

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I've realized that I tie my entire value to comparisons of where I'm at compared to others, financially.

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There it is.

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Not that I'm jealous of other people, thank God.

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Just that I'm not winning.

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I have this obsessive need to win in an unhealthy way.

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There's no.

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I don't need any pats on the back for, wow, you're such a fighter.

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No, it's.

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It's.

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It hurts.

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I'm sharing this with you guys because this is a classic example of what it means to do that work that we're talking about.

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Make a long story short, I said, wow, I'm tying myself to things that I don't fully control.

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It's like tying my good, my good, my good, my happiness to the bears or to the weather, to traffic or to any of the other examples we don't control.

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And money, I truly know I don't control because there's a million variables that happen with these accounts that maybe we could have done something a little bit better.

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But at the end of the day, these were not because we screwed up.

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This was not.

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They weren't going to a competitor.

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These were things that were completely out of our control.

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So I told Yaakov Danishevsky about it.

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I said, man, I had such a realization Friday night.

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I really realized that how stupid I am to consistently try to tie myself to a value system that I don't fully have control over.

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He's listening.

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He's like, yeah.

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He's like, you mind if I respond?

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I said, sure.

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He's like, yeah.

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None of that has anything to do with why you're unhappy.

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I said, okay.

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I mean, I thought it was pretty auradic that, you know, wow, you came up with this whole theory of, like, man, it's money that's constantly driving you and driving you away from your own self, and you don't control it.

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That's it.

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So stop tying yourself to it.

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Yaakov's like, no.

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He's like, the problem is, is that you value money as the measuring stick.

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That's problem number one.

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And on problem number two is that you have some comparison syndrome that you feel, like, inferior because you're not holding where others may be holding.

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So you've got a whole set of issues you need to deal with, okay, the one you thought of it, the one you thought was an issue, isn't the real one.

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And, you know, good luck.

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So, you know, thank God he put me in touch with a therapist a few weeks ago and I get to add that to the list.

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The point I'm making is that I came into the sun room.

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The point I'm making is that it didn't do anything, but knew my thinking was warped and I needed to deal with it.

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And yeah, I didn't come up with the right Hahara maybe, but I came up with enough that I could go back into the house and have a beautiful rest of my Shabbos and be okay because I let the thoughts creep in.

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I allowed the space for the thinking to affect me enough where I could be in a safe zone to deal with it and then from there be able to have a beautiful Shabbos.

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So that for me, from an asbeitist, those are things that I'm not going to sacrifice this year, and that's one of them.

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The second one doesn't really matter to bring up right now, but the point is that that is one thing where I know I need to do.

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I need to lean in.

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And again, not lean in on the go.

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Not lean in by watching tv, not lean in by having a Snickers, not lean in by ignoring my wife, not lean in by looking at porn, not lean in by.

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By distracting myself with something else, but just being with it because you will get clarity.

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And your thoughts do pass.

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You just have to give them space to do it.

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They don't pass if you're constantly on the go because they don't have a chance to be let in.

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They can't pass if you don't let them in.

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You have to let them in.

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You have to say, all right, come on in.

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Why am I feeling so bad for myself?

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Just let that be and get present and realize that the present moment is beautiful and perfect.

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And from there you can see change.

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Okay, let's talk about patience.

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However, there is a problem, especially in our generation, where hampers people from attaining greatness.

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There is a rule that in order for a person to reach greatness, he needs to try very hard for years, and he needs to be very patient with this.

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Many people in today's generation are not aware of this rule and thus become impatient with their avodah hashem, expecting to see immediate improvement.

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Imagine a farmer who comes to his field on the first day of planting season and he's disappointed that the crops haven't grown yet.

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This is unrealistic, as it takes several months of planting and plowing in order for anything to grow.

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Similarly, an impatient person wants to see immediate results from his vodus hashem.

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But this is impossible.

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He wouldn't be able to be a farmer either, because he has no idea how to be patient.

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As the generations grow closer to Mashiach, patience, when it comes to our spiritual growth, gets weaker.

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There's actually a deep reason for this.

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Since Mashiach is close to the soul, inside feels that there is very little time left to work on spiritual growth.

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And this is why people get impatient.

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However, although this feeling is correct, it has to be used correctly in its proper place.

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Let us explain.

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Explain.

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The mission of a states, the day is short and the labor is long, the workers are lazy and the reward is great, and the owner is knocking.

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When the day is short, what does the worker do?

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He might act quicker as a result, and he will finish work quickly as a result.

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This is wonderful.

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But another kind of worker will think that since there is very little time, he might as well just give up.

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This is the nature of our generation.

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There isn't enough time to work on our avodus hashem, and therefore people immediately want to see it all finished.

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But in the hashem, we need to have patience.

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Chazal say, today is for action and tomorrow is for reward.

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If somebody wants to live tomorrow already today, he is really saying that he doesn't want to be involved in his current avodas hashem.

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Living like this, a person will never get the true reward.

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Let me make a statement.

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We learned in Chalavas that you're not supposed to put in too much effort into your job.

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You're not supposed to expand yourself with work in ways that are going to be dangerous or make you travel more than you need, or make you work harder than you need.

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One of the reasons we say that is because we know that Hashem's in control of our financial income.

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And all he wants to see us is do the normal.

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And whatever chef is supposed to come to us will come through the normal.

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It's not going to come because we opened up multiple other businesses.

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What's the other reason?

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Maybe.

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Maybe the other reason is we can't have a primary focus of avodah hashem.

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If we work too hard, we can't possibly balance both equally and expect to find peace and serenity.

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We have to make that choice.

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states probably for the whole:

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We're not going to open up new lines of business unless they absolutely make total sense.

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We are going to go back to the basics and focus on our core business.

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We're going to make our people better, we're going to make our markets better.

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That is what we're going to do.

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The Menucha San Nefesh.

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I instantly felt the pressure of not having to open the four more states that we had lined up.

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The pressure to not open up this other respiratory business I've been working on, the pressure to not.

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It was almost like Hashem made it so difficult.

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So I'd get to the place to realize that, like, dude, you can't.

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You want this avaya, this Hashem thing.

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You got to create space.

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And it can't be even.

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One has to take the cake if you overwork or if you try to create abundance in a non spiritual state of mind.

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There is limited bandwidth to focus, find peace and serenity, which was the founding principle of this entire chabura.

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We all raised our hand the first chabura we had.

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Is it money we want?

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Is it fame?

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Is it power?

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Is it good looks?

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Or is it serenity and peace of mind?

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And everyone said if we could have that, then everything else wouldn't matter.

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So what it's saying here is that the nature of our generation, because of ping culture and smartphone culture and email culture, is immediacy.

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I was sitting with Gabi at some.

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I don't remember where we were at.

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And I just pointed to him because he's.

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He's begging me for they have to lock down their phones at Skokie Yeshiva.

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He's begging me for a second phone, not that he won't have filters on it, but that he can access other apps that he can't access.

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And I refused to get it for him.

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And I don't really refuse much, but I said, I'm not doing it.

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And I pointed him.

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We were sitting somewhere, I don't remember where.

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I said, look around.

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Oh, is that the Bears game?

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It was with Rafi.

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Were at the Bears game and the Bears were playing really well.

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And we were in the stands and I turned around just for a second to see if there was a line to get out, whatever, where we were sitting.

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And I'm not kidding you, the majority of people sitting behind us were all on their phones, not taking pictures on their phones at the Bears game during Bears offensive plays, not during a break or halftime.

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And I pointed to Rafi and I said, rafi, take a Look, for a second I said, you know why Tati doesn't have a smartphone anymore?

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I said, this is addiction.

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And he knows what addiction is because we're open and talk about it in the house.

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So this is what addiction looks like.

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You spent $850 a ticket or whatever they spent to come to an outdoor beautiful weather game where the bears are actually playing well and they're considered fans and everyone is locked into their phone, their kids are sitting next to them.

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There were kids on iPads at the game, not three year old kids like 13 year old boys.

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And we've made these technology devices our babysitters, both for ourselves.

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We adults need babysitting.

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We literally are grown men that need a babysitter to keep us company because we can't be at an entertainment venue being entertained anymore.

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The point I'm making is that we know this.

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It all goes back to our warped sense of thinking, the unwholeness we feel that the gap that dopamine fills for us fills that gap.

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The ability for immediacy, the immediate need for pleasure is so.

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It's a plague momish.

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It's the same thing with cancer.

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When they didn't know cigarettes were bad and then they knew.

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And this is going to be something we will talk about when these kids have suffered because of the fact that devices became such a prevalent part of our world.

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They became our babysitters.

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They will plague our children for years and we will say, how did no one step up?

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I promise you this.

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It's already coming out.

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Sri Raifah ordered it.

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There are companies coming out with dumb phones that will be able to use the same, be able to use different SIM cards, same number, so that people can have the choice.

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I'm going on date night.

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I don't have to switch my phone.

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I don't have to be a full flip phone guy.

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I can be a part time flip phone guy.

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And it's coming that it's coming to help Klal Yisrael and the entire world refocus.

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But it goes back to the immediacy, the immediacy of our pleasure center because our thinking is warped.

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And we were never taught how to work on our thinking because we're surrounded in an unconscious world, a mamish unconscious world.

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Even going to daven, which gives you a spirit spiritual bump, which is beautiful.

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It's still a dopamine effect because we're coming off a previous dopamine effect.

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And that's why sitting alone in a sunroom on a Friday night is so painful at Least when you first start doing that, because it's so foreign.

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There are only a few rare individuals in every generation who merited to taste the true spiritual pleasure of the world without having to work hard for it.

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Most people naturally have to work hard to grow spiritually.

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However, a person naturally wants to see results from his avodah hashem right away.

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If he doesn't see enjoyment out of it, he at least wants to see some growth right away.

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But this is impossible.

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We need great patience for any point that we work on.

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We have to wait many months until we merit the true world of Avedas Hashem.

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When a person hears an important matter and he understands it intellectually, he might immediately wish to internalize it in his heart.

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But the heart is initially a heart of stone.

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That is the way Hashem made.

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In order to transform a heart of stone into a soft heart of flesh, we need to work very, very hard.

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So just before we close out as we enter Yom Kippur, I'm not a rav.

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I'm not giving anything rabbinic.

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I'm just talking about my own mental health and the tools that I've been able to adopt and use.

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Let this be a year of mental health improvement.

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If we want the avodas hashem that he's going to talk about and we want the serenity, all of the things we talk about here once a week for a half hour won't matter without being able to get our head okay.

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And it's okay that in many cases it isn't, or that we've gotten used to just going with what is.

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Or, you know, this is just the takufa.

Speaker A:

We'll be 40, we'll be 50, we'll be 60.

Speaker A:

We can.

Speaker A:

We can chart that next 10 years.

Speaker A:

We can chart that next five years.

Speaker A:

We can chart that next year.

Speaker A:

But it has to start with that kind of work that we need to be able to do, do.

Speaker A:

Whether it's therapy.

Speaker A:

I put a video up today.

Speaker A:

The new brave is this radical vulnerability, being able to be vulnerable enough with yourself as a man, as a balabbas, as a husband, to say that I'm gonna work on some of the things that are clearly hurting me, whether that's what I look at, what I listen to, what I distract myself with.

Speaker A:

And if I can just tweak those knobs and levers a little bit each month, by next Yom Kippur, I could be a different person.

Speaker A:

I could literally be a different person.

Speaker A:

But we need strategy.

Speaker A:

And within that strategy has to be parts of it that are obviously the things that we have to do as yiddin, but they also have to be able to set ourselves up, to be able to have a chance at what we deal with every day.

Speaker A:

If we don't set ourselves up for success by getting things right in our head, then we might as well park it, because it's one of those things that ultimately continue to be very, very challenging.

Speaker A:

So I will let you guys go and wishing you guys a gemarchasimatova and hopefully this coming year will give you guys.

Speaker A:

May all that you daven for be the least that you guys get, and may our families continue to be good and healthy and wishing you guys all a gemar hasima taiba shkayach.

Speaker A:

All right.

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About the Podcast

Avodas HaLev
Pnimiyus HaTorah - Chicago
Avodas HaLev is sharing pnimiyus HaTorah to the Chicago community and the world.

About your host

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Aaron Toledano